On the first day of Trans-mas, I envisioned myself to be a 4
foot tall albino pygmy.
On the second day of Trans-mas, I envisioned myself to be a
90 year old white woman.
On the third day of Trans-mas, I envisioned myself to be a
non-islamic member of Ice Piss.
On the fourth day of Trans-mas, I envisioned myself to be an
honest democrat and failed.
On the fifth day of Trans-mas, I envisioned my weenie was a
hoo hoo and it was that time of the month.
On the sixth day of Trans-mas, I envisioned I was French and
that I resented toast and fries.
On the seventh day of Trans-mas, I envisioned I was a black
woman without a sex tape.
On the eighth day of Trans-mas, I envisioned I was good
looking and quality date material.
On the ninth day of Trans-mas, I envisioned I was a Clinton
and immune from prosecution.
On the tenth day of Trans-mas, I envisioned envisioned being
all of the above at the same time.
On the tenth day of Trans-mas, I envisioned I was a German
Sheppard and could lick my own balls.
On the eleventh day of Trans-mas, I envisioned I was a
Keebler Elf and had a lifetime supply of fresh chocolate chip cookies.
On the twelfth day of Trans-mas, I envisioned myself half
black and half white, dishonest, able to read a teleprompter like no one else
and married to…. The cure for the identification dishonesty syndrome.
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