It seems there is a growing disregard for common sense and an increasing sense of self importance where only you matter and anyone else on the road is unfortunately in your way.
Today I had another chance encounter with Joe Head Up His Ass as I was departing a Kroger parking lot and getting ready to engage the road warriors of the Snowflake Generation.
I had just completed a perfectly legal right hand turn out of the parking lot onto the feeder road using the green traffic light I was provided. I looked ahead and noticed the light at the next intersection was red and there was no one behind me - so I coasted to the light.
Then, HE ARRIVED!
Joe Head Up His Ass was driving a Nissan Altima and he was hell bent to win the Red Light 500 and he came out of nowhere and was soon on my ass (thankfully we practiced safe ass riding) and he proceeded to not want to be third in line in the right turn lane (of two left turn lanes) so he went for the left most of those two lanes and managed to get to the checkered flag, er, red light, ahead of everyone else and won a prize of showing his racing competence.
The light turns green and off he goes - the Honduh Accord in front of me proceeded at a reasonable rate and we both turned left from the right hand lane of the two left hand turn lanes and we did as we were supposed to ... we went to the appropriate right lane and all was good.
Joe Head Up His Ass decided that he was going to the left most lane (the passing lane) and then shot off ahead of all of us - he was the Richard Petty of this encounter and he was going to show us all how to drive. He was out in front. He was going to win this next stage as well.
Meanwhile the Honduh Accord driver had yet to find anyone whom he could tailgate and I followed him as we held our line in the right travel lane.
To our right was an exit lane to go onto the interstate.
Joe Head Up His Ass also noticed the exit lane on the very right of both me and the Honduh Accord driver (still without anyone whom he could tailgate).
With a flick of his steering wheel (but without aid of a turn signal), Joe Head Up His Ass crossed the two lanes to his right, an unoccupied center lane and then the two lanes that the Honduh Accord and I were occupying in good faith and within the speed limit. Across the front end of the Honduh Accord and missing by mere molecules approached Joe Head Up His Ass and he went from far left to cross two lanes and then to enter the right interstate onramp!
Thankfully I met probably the only Honduh Driver who had his head outside of his ass (an affliction that is so common with Honduh drivers that I wonder if you have to buy a Honduh while your head is up your ass - but that is another story).
So to recap, had Joe Head Up His Ass acted rationally, he could have pulled behind me at that stoplight and then made a simple and fuel efficient entrance to the interstate without any drama.
Instead Joe Head Up His Ass decided he'd let us drive with our heads outside of our bodies and how there was no accident was a miracle.
Hopefully Joe will suffer a traffic fatality later today and end his attack on our safety. What is more likely to happen is he will kill someone.
No comments:
Post a Comment