I spotted the telegraphing of run or pass plays when Donovan McNubb was the quarterback for the hapless Philthydelphia Football Team (winning a Super Bowl only makes you less hapless, not great); this fat, lardass was consistent - if the play being called was a run, before the snap of the football he never moved his head; if the pass was the play of his selection, he always moved his head.
I could have made a lot of money making that asshole's NFL career much shorter than it eventually became. He'd be in a full body cast if I ran defenses against him.
I've long posted here my contempt for people who buy and drive Honduhs and Toyoduhs. I call them the ugly Hon and Toyo Duh sisters. People who buy them think they've made such a great choice and feel superior to mere mortals who purchase something other than a Japanese car (the dollars return to the land of the rising son regardless if buck-toothed becky in Ohio screws in the door hinges in Marysville).
I have long noticed the arrogance of these Duh sister drivers - you can exceed the speed limit in the slow lane and they'll still tailgate you and ride your ass for miles. So it goes without saying, when said Duh sister driver wants to ride my ass, I suddenly lose ground speed and ensure that said jackass gets to experience travel below the posted speed limit.
I wasn't going to rehash this - Duh sister owners are yutzes. Given. Been there, done that.
But today, having to travel to visit with my folks today to wish the happy couple 58 years of marriage on the same day that is Father's Day, I endured more of the Duh sister level of driving "excellence".
Encounter one: I'm driving in the slow lane at the posted speed limit and soon to my right will be a TWO LANE exit. I reached that point where the exit lanes begin and not one car was to my right.
Then enters Joe Duh Sister Head Up His Ass (in all fairness, it could have been a cunt owner for all I knew). JDSHUHA decides to pass me on the left of the FOUR lane interstate and then darts across my lane and into the double right hand exit. Thankfully I was driving with my head outside of my body and I got to marvel at the driving skill of the Duh Sister driver (only then wishing a nice rollover accident with all occupants being tossed outside of the Duh Sister and then immediately being road kill as a fleet of Ryder trucks came barreling down over their stupid asses.
Encounter two: Having stopped for groceries at the local Kroger, I encountered a near new Honduh Accord sedan that was so near to my ass in the lane in front of the building that I swear I could feel the peen touching my backside. As this lane is one that runs between the store buildings and the parking lot, a logical person with his head outside of his body would look for pedestrians and would show just a bit more common sense than trying to touch my bumper with yours. Realizing that the imagine in my rear view mirror WAS AS LARGE AS REALITY, I removed my foot off the accelerator which made said Duh Sister owner very unhappy. Of course we were likely only traveling 10 miles per hour while I was "gunning it", but the Honduh owner wanted to go much faster. Thankfully there were human targets coming from the parking lot and buildings so even the Honduh owner didn't want a vehicular homicide charge.
But he had more up his sleeve, this cunninglinguistic ass muncher!
Exiting the parking lot to the feeder road, I made sure the Duh Sister owner had to come to a complete stop at the red light (these drivers never feel the need to treat a stop light as something other than an inconvenience - to stop is to demean said privileged road warrior with the fucked up H on the steering wheel).
Ah yes, this was going to be precious - and the Duh Sister driver did not disappoint me at all. The feeder road would eventually have three lanes - two left turn lanes and a right lane for those who want to.... turn right. The lane I chose also doubles as a straight ahead AND left turn lane (I never go straight). Given Duh sister driver could have waited approximately half a second to get into the left most turn lane, said Duh Sister immediately passed me on the right only to cut me off and to go from his right most lane to ... you guessed it, to the LEFT MOST lane.
Jethro the Duh Sister won this race! He beat me to the stop light and mind you, he is in the LEFT MOST LANE instead of staying behind me in the right most of those two left turn lanes.
Jethro had not left this situation without posting an entry to the Duh Sister Hall of Fame. Oh, no, he didn't just do that. The light turned green and Jethro in the left most turn lane turns left (surprise) and then guns it and sweeps from the left most of FOUR road lanes to the right most lane that is now an exit lane onto the interstate. Being a prudent person with my head outside of my ass, I turned from the right most turn lane and could have made ONE lane change to the right to exit. And Jethro could have done the same had he stayed behind me with his bumper up my ass. But no, this is a Honduh owner who defies all logic and violates motor vehicle laws like they are GM recall notices.
So this leads me to the question:
Are you a blithering idiot, a jerk, a foolish, arrogant asswipe BEFORE you buy a Honduh, or are Honduh's producing mental blivetheads who are dangers to themselves and others when behind the wheel of those ugly, bloated pieces of Honduh shit? Because if you were rational before buying a Honduh, is there now enough evidence to declare Honduhs a danger to society and to have them pulled from the market and banned from the highways - and then to be sent to junkyards where they are to be crushed and melted and to be turned into Toyoduhs?
Are Honduh owners so reckless that they should be locked up for life because either they were born assholes or made them by fumes from Honduh's degrading cheap plastics?
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