Pardon me while I gloat just a bit. A nice randy and juicy gloat that combines elaborate superior dance moves with middle fingers displayed in z, x, and up yours formations.
This is so delicious.
We've wondered why Chlamydia Jenner Kardashian has retained her man parts for so long.
At first I thought she was just being frugal - why worry about a penis and a set of shrinking 'nads when you have the boobs that practically make you a woman. And as long as you're wrapped in the finest cheap shit you buy, who knows what is lurking down there anyway? As long as you have the boobs you are more than just a cross-dresser who gets wood from putting on black lacy and dreams of menstruating. With boobs you are going to be the sexual object of some sick fuck's dreams and that is all that matters. And since you are nearly as old as Hillary Clinton, you can establish that your boobs are perkier than hers.
And you don't have kankles. Yet.
I suppose my glee - my delicious "told you so" celebrations - are near psychic in nature. I knew this was all a gimmick - I never even remotely considered that when this publicity charade had reached critical mass that Chlamydia would go through with removing her man tube and the twins. I just knew there was more to this thing than a man seriously thinking that he wanted to be a 70 year old woman with a yeasty man-made vajayjay and eventually sinking boobs that would hang to his knees during the twilight years of his life.
Chlamydia has been quoted as saying "it isn't easy being a woman" - you do have to feel for Chlamydia - having to put on makeup, bondo, and getting your hair to look just right with the cheap shit she buys would tax even the most ambitious cross-dresser. Sleeping with those boobs would cause any man to rethink the transition. And having all the trappings of a woman while still having a peen and nuts would drive any normal woman to tears as the peen would make sure she is paid 72% of what a man makes and that an erection would be considered rape.
Chlamydia is despondent. She might take several years to reassess her dog and pony show while still clinging to the hopes of dating a woman. And it appears that Chlamydia is not a friend of lesbians as evidenced by her appearance on the "Ellen Show" a few months ago. No self respecting lesbo will dare date a psuedo woman as long as the instrument of rape is still there and functioning and able to deposit a nice creamy load on a 300 pound lesbians bread dough like breasts.
Ian Halperin, the author of "Kardashian Dynasty: The Controversial Rice of America's Royal Family" has reported that sources tell him that Chlamydia has just been miserable these last few months. Having to constantly apply the bondo to make her face look like the air-brushed versions in "Vanity Fair" would try any man's patience as well as having to make sure that no stray facial hair should appear. I'd feel for Chlamydia but I just don't care.
I also understand that Chlamydia is having issues when Theodore Cruise picked a real woman as a running mate and not her. I understand completely. Chlamydia has bigger boobs.
And so the never-ending soap opera of Chlamydia continues - she won several awards as a woman while she never was - her best moments were when she was a man - and having television shows about her transition just aren't as satisfying as failing to pay attention while driving and causing a chain reaction accident that killed a real woman.
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