Dateline: Pee-on-you-yang, North Korea
Operation Wet Dream was intended to launch "Agent Orange" at America and to usher in the rule by men with two inch peens and bad haircuts.
On a day that was declared the "Day of the Sun" celebration of the malformed evil Hobbit Kim Numba Two's 105th birthday, North Korea was expected to be able to have something large and phallic like to launch to show that they are a serious player against the rule of the evil Orange Haired America-first President.
Just hours ago, the intercontinental ballistic missile was test fired and ultimately went limp and exploded in a devastating failure.
UV News Service has confirmed that the evil Kim Jung Un Hung was so furious with this failure that he had his entire missile development team loaded into a submarine and had it blown up to spite his own face. There are serious issues with this report of the death of the scientists because it is quite possible the submarine blew up because it was also a piece of shit engineered by half wits and spiteful communists who were too lazy to double check that all the wires were hooked up correctly.
UV News Service can confirm that all aboard are dead, dead, dead, and the evil North Korea midget dick stormed off to his room to use a pair of tweezers to masturbate to American porn. We can confirm with certainty that his missile did not launch and the whole day was ruined and ended in total limpitude.
The North Korean ICBM was named "Agent Orange" after Kim Jung Un Hung was infuriated by President Trump's insistence to stand up to the North Korean midget and to dare call him names. Kim Jung Un Hung made it a keystone of his next five years to launch something long and hard at Donald Trump and today's disaster could cause a long line of executions using the Ice Piss book on executions "1001 Ways to Kill Your Enemy". Kim Jung Un Hung has previously been very creative with dealing with his enemy and it is entirely possible that someone could be put to death listening to former American dictator King Pimple of a Man's entire speech library or by forcing the condemned to stare at Moochelle's hairy twat until dead.
Over a million North Koreans were required to gather in their finest and brightest outfits in the celebration of the 105th birthday of their former despot and there were smiles all around as every attendee looked like Democrat Nancy Pelosi, the twig with tits, as her face froze in an evil grin after telling America that in order to find out what was in Obamascare that they'd have to vote for it first.
UV News Service can confirm that no one attending this celebrationhad a face in any less in bliss than an orgasm. The women were so happy and gleeful that they pissed themselves and men were as gleeful as a 12 year old with a Playboy. There were smiles all around. It was as if the entire country was mesmerized over Kim Jung Un Hung like snowflakes in America were for Hillary Rodhambone Clinton's promise of being the next President.
The North Korean official news service, CNN, went to blissful images of fields of flowers and an eeriely similar clip of Laura Ingles Wilder as she ran down the hill to meet her Pa during the opening scene of "Little House on the Praire". There was no mention of the missile misfire and the whole affair had been cloaked with the pre-sell of a big bang so no one was the wiser that there really was a big bang and it wasn't just another work of Obama's PR team about his Presidency.
UV News Service can confirm that the Congressional Black Caucus and other ethnic supremacy groups on the left will call for Donald Trump's impeachment because of this missile failure.
Now a rising star within the Democrat party, former living person and new official zombie, Congressputz Maxine "Stonepuss" Waters, another leftist woman with the face of a camel, has launched into her speel about wanting Trump impeached and that the North Korean situation is proof that Trump is colluding with intelligent people to make a mockery of our enemies and making America look good. UV News Service cannot confirm if Maxine Waters has a pulse or any living tissue remaining, but we can confirm she's an evil bitch that needs to be silenced by driving a stake through her forehead and covering her in holy water.
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