Dateline: Washington, D.C. (or Trumpingrad)
It was widely anticipated that after Barron Trump had finished school at the Upper Crust Snobskygrad Preparatory School in New York that he and his boobed mother would travel to Trumpingrad and occupy the people's house - and so it happened today, June 11th - the invasion of Washington, D.C. has now been completed and it is now officially renamed "Trumpingrad".
Booblania is seen clutching her ultraexpensive purse and kotex container with her elderly buffoon of a husband trying to horndog a hold with his own gnarled hand onto hers. Barron, who is 11 and who "suffered significant mental anguish thinking that his father had been beheaded," is seen walking while wearing a t-shirt that says "The Expert" which would imply that his knowledge of beheading and the mental damage of his father's contrived beheading was something he could handle with ease without lasting effects.
Unlike the Obamas who brought with them four dogs wherever they traveled, the Trumps only bring Barron with them; it is rumored that Barron will soon be seeing if he can sow his oats in each room of the White House before he starts school in the fall so that he can tell his new friends that he is practicing big stick diplomacy. Barron also cannot wait until his parents go on vacation so that he can perform a remake of "Risky Business" complete with dance routines in tighty whities and playing with his big stick anticipating a visit from a Russian hooker named "Screwlanka". Although Barron is still too young to drive, he is hoping to secure one of the secret service's black full-sized SUV's where he can have it land in the reflecting pool at the Washington Monument.
Booblania Trump is a former minimally dressed model with supreme rich taste and a wonderful eastern European accent (not to be mistaken for Russian) and she'll spend the next (and last few months) of the Trump Presidency redecorating the White House in over the top colors and gold leafing on everything not painted bright blue, bright red, and bright purple. She will also deploy numerous Faberge eggs that will be involved in a theft by Barron's new girlfriend "Screwlanka" and hearings demanded by Aunt Esther Maxine "Stone Puss" Waters where she'll demand Barron's castration and his father's impeachment all to be conducted on live television before the American people.
We were not able to confirm how long Booblania and Barron, The Expert, will be staying in Washington - whether they plan to stay in Washington for the upcoming school year or if they'll be forced to leave Washington after being driven out by mobs of people demanding Trump's head for real.
UPDATE: June 12th, 8:30 a.m.
The United States Marine Corps has announced that the pilot on Marine One, the helicopter that carried the Trumps from Andrews Air Force Base (Trumpingrad International Airport) has been reassigned after making an obvious and disgusting leering gaze upon Booblania's backside while the First Family were departing Marine One.
According to White House spokesasshole Sean Spicer (see what K Spice can do to you?), the Marines found it distasteful that a Marine would leer at Booblania and that no marine ever leered at the bare-armed Moochelle as she lovingly held the hand of her King as they departed Marine One with their four dogs in tow and sometimes the extra baggage of Moochelle's Mooching Mom following behind making sure no one noticed her slipping back into the White House rent free on the dime of the taxpayers for her upkeep and kennel charges. "The Marines did what was right by reassigning that Marine for leering and will undergo extensive counseling as to why da male should never leer at da female."
There is an alternate explanation for the Marine pilot's reassignment and it is even more disturbing.
According to the extra crispy Colonel Sanders, "That pilot was really fancying our latest chicken, the Barron Basket, thin strips of white meat chicken lightly beaten until the meat is relaxed. It is obvious that the Marine was admiring our new product who will be a real hit as his basket becomes widely available for all at KFC locations in the greater Trumpingrad area."
This reporter finds both explanations as disturbing and hopes he was just relocated because he looks funny.
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